Almost

21:03 pm


today ,i almost lose the most important person in my life.
we had a huge fight well its not actually a fight cause im not mad at him and i don't make any argument and it was all cause of my fool mistakes, i should've more concerned of his feelings but i don't, and it was too late i let him down again. but how could i know when i have no clue at all, i soon realized when it was too late and he's already upset and dissapointed with me. i was down and hate my self cause i swear i swear to my dearest god that i've done my very best i've done everything that i could to make him happy, to make him proud to have me, cause i love him so much and he's the best thing i've ever had and it hurts so fucking much.  i did everything to calm him down, i said everything, no lies, and gladly cause i keep my ego to my self and stay patience i didn't lose him and i win his heart back, i couldnt feel happier than this like really, my days have been like the worst i cannot afford a huge ass pain of losing my biggest happiness.


i think next week specifically next saturday my shcools going to give my report card , fuck.
i can't stand seeing 0 in my report card..and failed.. i think im going to kill my self,..
well not really 0 but i did really freakin bad in the exam i told you i'm stupid at math and almost all the exam is basically math in the hell of different levels. im screwed.
i just can't deal with this anymore... i had tons of privates lessons but it seems not working what is wrong with me. but i can't fool my self i know its because i never make revision at home and did not study hard and lazy ass procrastinator.. damn ma. you should be studying right now, no wonder you're failing-_-
i promise to everything i love i will do better in the 2nd terms, i promise! :"D

next sunday im going to have english exam, my favorite <3 alhamdulilah i love english subject and i enjoy english exam, the only subject i put my hopes on  :"")
wish me luck who ever reading this,and thanks for wasting your precious time to read this nonsense blog of mine, i love you! :D



bonne nuit,
xoxo